Cyber World Mask Rocks!

Today, I have successfully prevented a potentially heartbreaking process, I think.

I have been wanting to do something about you. I cannot keep you, that I know. I don't want to be haunted with sadness when you leave. I do not want to keep good memories of you. When I think about it, no, I don't want to be just a friend. Well, not at this point at least. Eventually, maybe. Because you are a good person. And I like you very much. But it's not the usual "like" and that's why I don't like it.

I hope I have been all the things a guy will not like in a girl. I have shown you emotional, talkativeness and overzealousness. True, at some points,I may have shown parts of the real me. The point of it was to deliver them consistently, continuously and in huge portions.

I hopefully have FOCUSED on you enough to make you not want me in your life. That way, I have no choice.

I want to think straight and not smile when moments with you cross my mind. They keep coming quite often. In repeats and they drive me crazy! I have to take matters into my own hands. I am the only person who can change how I am.

I know I either have to be too proud or you have to make the choice to walk away from me. While it is possible that I will run after you (which I pray my litttle pride will prevent me from), the latter is still easier. I have come to a point where my walls are down and am being torn apart. And the little strength comes from being a girl. And so a girl, I have become.

A sad one.