Caro Mia

cooking for two

It was weird and comforting to read this on a friend's wall today. You see, she just got hitched last month. For the second time (to a different man, matter of factly).

"New hubby and I are going through soooo much trials and challenges for the past few months and there were a couple of times I broke down, I scream inside an empty room, we cried, we get agitated, we stop talking, we can't stop talking ( lol ) we almost give up but we NEVER felt empty because deep inside we KNOW what we want. We want to be together.

I believe we are not alone, ALL of us have been in this situation, is in this situation and will be in this situation and I just want to share this poem I learnt in the primary school that keeps me STANDING in whatever situation.

Sending love and light to you all xoxo"

When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
Whe he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

For a while, I have admired how awesome her life was, or how she comes across on her social media posts. Until our common friend came to visit where she learned about that she was in fact already separated from her then husband. Up until today, her new life seemed like a fairy tale, yet again. Their wedding photos looked magical. But then had she not posted what has been happening outside of these wonderful photos, who would have known except perhaps the people she chose to share this to?

Consequently, last night I was catching up on some couples who were very social media supportive of each other. All celebrity couples. Do I really want this digital age of relationships where our happiness/unhappiness is available for people who aren't really involved? Sure, I would send couple photos to friends who are supportive of our relationship or reach out to my closest friends for help when I need to (or just for a listening ear) but I am not the kind of person who broadcasts the state of my relationship. My posts are mostly for humor, information, or entertainment. And unless I am told it was important to someone's happiness or security, I am not adamant doing these things. And unless my personal life has turned into humor, important information, or is something that I personally find merely entertaining, it would not make it to my wall.
That part of "we want to be together" is something that hits home. I may not be a person who likes posting all the magical moments in my life but I keep them in my heart. And the man I want to be with would be someone who values what is real (he is welcome to ask me to put some on reel or he can do that himself). We may end up fighting or not talking, or talking too much (that hurtful/mean words are said), but I would want to be with someone who wants to be with me despite all that. Whenever I needed to write about my feelings, I would do it almost anonymously, as is the purpose of this blog. It is my heart, after all.